Writing the script for a video abstract is an iterative process. It is advisable to revise the text before you record it. Here are five guidelines that use Ava’s script as an example.

In section 2.2 you explored basic tips to keep in mind when writing a video abstract. Ava’s script has already been revised. The edited text illustrates five points to consider when editing your own text.

ONE

Ensure that the audience understands the language you use. You may want to use technical terms to address peers in your discipline. If you do so, explain such language so that you can also reach researchers from other disciplines and a broader audience.

When you are communicating only via the written and spoken word, you must use language to gloss technical terms. Such glosses can include explanations and examples, as in the sentence:

Our research focuses on cetaceans – in other words, on marine animals such as whales, dolphins, and porpoises.

In multimodal communication, you have the added benefit that you can clarify meanings with images. For example, the title Multiple Stressors in Cetacean Research marks this video abstract as directed at specialists familiar with the meaning of the word Cetacean. By adding illustrative images, this technical term is at the same time made accessible to a broader audience.

TWO

Keep your sentences short. There are two ways to do this: be concise and split long sentences.

Be concise:

The reduction of stressors is our goal.

Expressed more concisely becomes:

We strive to reduce stressors.

The revised version is not only shorter, it also has other strengths. The generic verb is has been replaced by the more specific strive. The verb is closer to the front. And the abstract noun or nominalization – reduction of – has been converted to a simpler form of the same word that is also a verb.

Split long sentences:

We also suggest to further improve research by the scientific community collaborating across disciplines combining different methods so that we can achieve an integrative holistic picture of the animals in question and eventually be able to contribute to sustainable management options.

This sentence can be divided into three.

We also suggest improving research across disciplines combining diverse methods. If the scientific community joins forces in this way, we can develop an integrative holistic picture of the animals in question. And the more comprehensive our picture becomes, the better will we be able to contribute to sustainable management for cetaceans in our oceans.

Starting a sentence with And would be uncommon in formal printed texts that the addressee reads off the page. But since this script simulates spoken language, starting the last sentence with And will work.

THREE

Use active where possible.

This sentence contains three verbs in the passive:

But in order for sustainable management options for cetaceans to be developed, individual stressors have to be distinguished and their underlying effects understood.

Because the author uses the passive, the verb – which is the key to understanding the sentence – appears at the end. Moving the verb closer to the front makes the sentence easier to decode. The active also has the additional advantage that it can make explicit who the agent that is doing something is, in this case researchers. The active option could be:

But to develop sustainable options to manage cetaceans, researchers must distinguish individual stressors and understand their underlying effects.

However, the passive can be necessary when we do not know who the agent is. Sometimes the passive is also more appropriate because it allows us to move the object to the front. Fronting the object can emphasise it. Fronting the object can also contribute to the flow of ideas. In the example below, fronting threats in the second sentence emphasises the threats. It also connects to the word threats in the sentence before, thereby strengthening the flow between sentences.

Marine environments are highly exposed to threats, and there are limits to what nature can bear. Often, those threats are produced by human societies and lead to stress within marine animals.

FOUR

Put what is important early in the sentence. This can include grammatically important elements like verbs, or phrases that make the function of a sentence clear.

In the sentences below, fronting for example immediately makes clear that the next sentence offers an example rather than a logical inference.

But when we take a closer look at individual cases, we see that this does not affect all species. North Atlantic right whales, for example, are barely recovering, while other whale species recover at 7% per year. We don’t yet know why that is.

Suggested alternative:

But when we examine individual cases, we see that this does not affect all species. For example, North Atlantic right whales are barely recovering, while other whale species have been recovering at 7% per year. We don’t yet know why that is.

Fronting what is important can also include putting the more general umbrella term before the items that follow.

Our research focuses on marine animals such as whales, dolphins, and porpoises which are classified as cetaceans.

This can be rendered as:

Our research focuses on cetaceans – in other words, on marine animals such as whales, dolphins, and porpoises.

FIVE

Make connections between ideas clear. This includes the connections created by linking words (e.g. but, and, therefore) as well as the connections between pronouns (e.g. it and they) and what these pronouns refer to.

Linking words:

Ensure that you use linking words and that you use the right ones. In the following example, however suggests a contrast. But the connection between the ideas is that the latter is a logical inference which follows from the former. This logical connection is more accurately signalled by Therefore.

We don’t yet know why that is. However, we have to ask ourselves: what research is still needed to establish why certain species recover from stresses but others do not?

Suggested alternative:

We don’t yet know why that is. Therefore, we have to ask ourselves: what research is still needed to establish why certain species recover from stresses but others do not?

Pronouns and their referents:

In the following example the referent of They is ambiguous; it can be researchers or cetaceans.

Scientists observe cetaceans closely. They spend long hours under water.

To make the referent clear, some repetition and/or reformulation may be necessary.

Scientists observe cetaceans closely. These researchers spend long hours under water with the animals.